No Time to Waste, No Time to be Sad
by JeanieMD
Summary: What if Andy had misunderstood, when Sam woke up in the hospital?
" _McNally?"_

Andy remembered standing up and moving closer to Sam's hospital bed.

" _I don't want to waste any more time. And, uh, I don't want to be sad anymore."_

"Me neither," she had responded, and Sam had smiled, that crooked smile that always touched her heart because she could just imagine the little boy he had once been.

" _Okay,"_ he had said, and did a typical Swarek double-take before smiling at her again.

Andy had left almost immediately after that, exhausted physically and emotionally by the events of the past 48 hours. It was hard to believe that so much had happened in such a short time: Chloe shot, Oliver abducted, Kevin Ford actually getting into the station, and shooting Sam before being shot and killed himself by Nick. Andy shuddered at the memory of Sam on the floor, struggling to get up, and in the ambulance, white with shock and loss of blood as Andy had tried to keep him awake and focused, afraid of what might happen if he closed his eyes. She had felt then that if Sam died, she would too.

But he didn't die, and he was going to make a full recovery. Andy held onto that thought as she sank into sleep, not waking until nearly 24 hours later.

"Oh, crap!" she said as she realized what time it was. She had intended to visit Sam in the hospital before going in for her shift, but now there was no time. She would just have to wait, but she wouldn't be able to be patient. She needed to see him as soon as possible, so they could start making their way back together again.

Ten and a half hours later Andy was standing outside Sam's room, taking a deep breath before knocking and entering without waiting for a response.

Sam looked up, and his look of surprise was followed immediately by a frown. "Hey," he said slowly, "what are you doing here?"

"I slept in so I couldn't get here before shift, but I came straight from work. I couldn't wait to see you," Andy said in a rush, as she came close to the bed and reached out towards Sam's hand. He pulled it away quickly, before she could touch him, and now the expression on his face was confusion.

"I thought we agreed that we weren't going to do this," he said quietly, and now Andy was the one who looked confused.

"What do you mean by _this_?"

"We weren't going to waste any more time trying to make something work that obviously never will work. Something we've tried before that has only made both of us miserable. _We_ don't work, Andy – we never have, and we never will. And like I said, I just don't want to be sad anymore."

Andy felt as if a pail of ice water had been thrown in her face. "I thought you meant…I didn't realize…Sam, I thought you felt the same way I do, what I said to you in the ambulance."

"I heard you, but it's not enough. Sometimes people love each other and bring out the best in each other. That's not us, Andy. We bring out the worst. I've hurt you, and you've hurt me – we just can't keep on making ourselves miserable."

Andy stood motionless, trying to make sense of Sam's words. She felt a wave of nausea, and realized that she had to get out of this room as quickly as possible. "I'm sorry, Sam," she said softly. "I did misunderstand but I won't bother you again." She turned without waiting for a response and pulled the door open. Turning back to look at him she managed to control herself enough to say a soft goodbye, then let the door close behind her. Once outside she leaned against the wall, struggling not to start crying, knowing that if she started she wouldn't be able to stop. It was a vain attempt, though, as the tears welled up in her eyes, spilling down her face as she convulsed in sobs. Her body heaved as her misery overwhelmed her and she slid down the wall to sit on the floor.

Suddenly she felt strong arms gather her into a tight embrace, and a voice half muffled by her hair said, "Hey, I've got you. You're safe, I'm here and I'm not gonna let you go."

It took a minute for Andy to realize where she was: in bed, curled up with her back to Sam, who wasn't even really awake but who was holding her tightly, and whose warm breath she could feel against the back of her neck. _That's not what happened! That isn't what he meant,_ she thought, and she could feel herself beginning to relax. _I was afraid for one moment that he was trying to end things between us, but he wanted the same thing I did, what I've always wanted, for us to be together. To be together, and to make a life together, to create a family._

Andy shifted a little, trying to get comfortable, not an easy thing to do in the last stages of pregnancy. Sam moved one hand down to her belly, soothing their very vigorous son or daughter back to sleep. Andy smiled contentedly as she sank once more into a deep sleep, sure that there would be no more bad dreams that night.


End file.
